Chapter 21: Why Is the Romance of the Three Kingdoms I See Different from Yours?

For the next couple of days, Luo Chen spent his time accompanying Luo Tianyi as they wandered aimlessly about. He finally understood why this little rascal had so openly taken advantage of her brother yesterday. It was simply because she’d found out he was loaded.

But since money wasn’t an issue, Luo Chen didn’t mind splurging. If Tianyi liked something, no matter the price, he’d buy it for her.

And so, they bought and bought and bought—until Luo Chen realized, tragically, that he was running out of money again.

As for debts? He decided to ignore them for now and just let them accumulate.

“Luo Chen, I want some Häagen-Dazs!”

Passing by a specialty store, Luo Tianyi pointed eagerly at the large Häagen-Dazs sign, her face full of longing.

“We just ate so many boiled and fried foods. Aren’t you worried you’ll get an upset stomach from eating this now?” Luo Chen couldn’t understand how Tianyi’s stomach functioned; she swallowed so many random things without any trouble. Was her stomach a landfill?

“That kind of strange thing would never happen to me.”

“I’m saying, I will!” Luo Chen said helplessly.

In the end, he couldn’t withstand his little sister’s pleading, and compromised. They each got a Häagen-Dazs and sat down in the restaurant.

Why were there only the two of them? Because early that morning, Yan He had hurriedly greeted them and rushed home. After all, spending two whole nights at a boy’s house—even if the families were close—was bound to cause misunderstandings.

No, in fact, it was precisely because they were close that the misunderstanding would be even bigger.

Luo Chen figured Yan He was probably enduring a fatherly iron fist of love at this very moment. He hoped that Uncle Yan would forget about him by then.

The last thing Luo Chen wanted was to wake up one morning and find his door blocked by a hundred burly men—since, rumor had it, Yan He’s family ran a martial arts school with about a hundred students.

“Luo Chen, aren’t you going to eat?” Luo Tianyi looked at the untouched Häagen-Dazs in Luo Chen’s hand, puzzled.

“Hmm? You can have it. I can’t eat another bite.”

Luo Chen gazed indulgently at the empty carton in Tianyi’s hand and pushed his own portion toward her.

By the way, the two of them—just a boy and a girl, sitting face to face—did this count as a date? Sensing the envious glances from the people around them, Luo Chen hurriedly shoved that unrealistic thought out of his mind.

She was his real sister! He definitely didn’t want Yan He to break his legs and send him to the orthopedist in Germany.

“Hahaha, Mom, Dad, look! This video is hilarious!”

At the next table, a boy of about eleven or twelve, holding a big tablet, tilted his head and spoke to his mother.

It was an ordinary family of three. Luo Chen glanced over and saw that the video playing on the tablet was his own work, “How to Make Children Fall in Love with Studying.”

Was it really that popular already? Luo Chen hadn’t expected to run into an audience member just by stepping out. What a coincidence.

But now, was he destroying the budding flowers of the nation?

Watching the strange grin spread across the boy’s face, Luo Chen realized he was to blame.

The boy’s parents watched a bit with him, smiling at first, but then the mother’s face darkened.

“Who is this guy, anyway? Even Professor Yuan, such a good man, gets parodied.” The mother glared at her husband and son, displeased. She’d recently attended Professor Yuan’s lecture, found it so reasonable, and now it was being mocked in a meme video?

“Hey, you never know. Who can say whether that professor is good or bad? What if he’s actually a scoundrel?” The father didn’t care much. Who would overthink a meme video?

As long as it was funny, wasn’t that enough?

“So you’re letting our child watch this? What if he can’t find a wife in the future? Will you take responsibility?”

The father was stumped. That was indeed a big problem. He turned and barked at their son.

“Kids shouldn’t be watching these meme videos! Not allowed!”

The innocent boy, scolded out of the blue, switched the video to “Romance of the Three Kingdoms,” his eyes brimming with tears.

Luo Chen could only give the kid a sympathetic look.

If you can’t find a girlfriend in the future, don’t come looking for me—and definitely don’t come looking for a boyfriend instead!

It seemed he’d have to keep his identity tightly hidden, or else he’d be drowned in parental outrage.

The boy had no idea the creator who’d gotten him scolded was sitting nearby. He started watching “Romance of the Three Kingdoms.”

Luo Chen glanced curiously—it was episode 69 of the old TV adaptation.

Hmm? Isn’t episode 69 the one where—

“Is this Zhuge Kongming?”
“Yes, it is.”

Hearing those all-too-familiar lines, Luo Chen nearly fell out of his chair. Only Luo Tianyi’s reproachful look made him sit up straight again. Why did such ordinary dialogue sound so wrong to him?

“Since the time of Emperor Huan and Emperor Ling, the Yellow Turbans have run rampant, and the land has been in turmoil. Now, our mighty Wei has a million armored soldiers and a thousand fine generals. If you surrender your arms and submit respectfully, you won't lose your noble title. The nation will be at peace and the people happy—wouldn’t that be wonderful?”

It was one of the most memorable scenes in the Three Kingdoms series. Even the young boy was watching intently, but Luo Chen found it increasingly hilarious, barely holding back laughter.

He couldn’t help it. In his previous life, this scene had been parodied endlessly online. Every line was a punchline to him now.

Watching the original while imagining the meme version, Luo Chen thought he was doing pretty well not to burst out laughing.

Should he recreate that meme video in this world? The boy’s reaction would surely be priceless.

“Mama, why does that big brother’s face look so weird?” the boy asked, puzzled by the way Luo Chen looked like he wanted to laugh but didn’t dare.

What was so funny? He couldn’t see it.

Luo Chen snapped out of it, realizing with embarrassment that the boy’s whole family was watching him warily.

“It’s nothing. I was just wondering whether you’re really old enough to understand ‘Romance of the Three Kingdoms,’” Luo Chen replied smoothly, unfazed by their scrutinizing gazes.

“I’m already grown up! Of course I understand. Zhuge Liang is amazing!” The boy seemed quite sensitive about being underestimated and glared at Luo Chen.

His parents, after glancing at Luo Tianyi, who was happily eating across from Luo Chen, relaxed a little. After all, no bad guy would bring such a pretty girlfriend along to do anything nefarious.

Luo Chen looked at the earnest little boy. In a few days, you’ll be laughing at “Three Kingdoms” too.

But… did this count as ruining childhoods?

To the readers in the comment section: All your suggestions have been received. Ah Ling is indeed a compound surname, Le Zheng; that was my mistake, but it’s been corrected and won’t affect your reading.